2021.11.29 11:14 MissAuthorPrincess84 If COVID were a person, I'd be it
This is long, but here it is:
Something is wrong with me, I don't know if I'm under a curse from birth, because I was born out of wedlock and am a bastard or what but I have experienced bad luck since November 24, 1984. I'm the type of person who loves everyone, whether I know them or not. I'm sort of a people pleaser, but it's only because I like being that way. I love pleasing people and being overly nice. I'm the type of person who would love to just go up to people on the street sometimes and just hug them just to do so. My mom says I'm like a mixture of Giselle from the film Enchanted, (as far as with how naive and nice and friendly I am) and a very mild version of Elmyra, in regards to having overenthusiastic affection. Anyway, that's how I am.
If I see a stranger on social media who has a birthday, I search online to find an online birthday greeting and send it to them. That's just the type of heart I have. I'm so nice that I don't even hold grudges, ever. I have an extremely hard time hurting someone's feelings. I can get mad now if someone disrespects me or insults me and I'll verbally snap back, but then hours later, I forget all about being mad and will want to be friends with the person or people I'm mad at. I hear Sagittariuses are like that but I don't know....
In elementary school, despite my repeated and constant attempts to make friends, I could make none, perhaps it was because I was in an all-black school and despite me being black, I didn't act black - meaning, I liked classical/rock/80's and 90s music that wasn't black. My family - my cousins never liked to accept me, and I had no idea why, perhaps it was because while they were talking about boys and dating and stuff, I was into....books and music and that made me unpopular with them(?) ANY guy I liked in elementary ALWAYS treated me as if I were the plague and it ended in rejection.
I've never had a boyfriend, a romantic encounter (yes, never so that means...) I've never had friends or anything. I was never accepted by ANY of my cousins nor my aunts and uncles - but then neither was my mother. My aunts, uncles killed my grandparents and the one uncle who truly did love my mom and me, to get my grandparents' house and my grandparents and my uncle's money. So, they're pretty evil and so are their children (my cousins)
Anyway though, I didn't have ONE friend all throughout elementary and I was horribly bullied in elementary and in high school, it grew worse. I was in an alternative high school, not because I was bad but because it was the only school in my district and so I "had" to go there. In high school, I had zero friends, despite repeatedly being outgoing, talking to people, trying to make friends, JUST like in elementary, it seemed they avoided me like the plague.
And the bullying was something fierce in high school, every and ANY guy I liked always ended in rejection, just like everything else, they avoided me like the plague, and it wasn't because I was fat or ugly or unpretty. No, strangers would always tell me, "wow, you're pretty!" ALL the time and I was only 130, and athletic, like I am now. I look like a younger Janet Jackson like I did during elementary and high school. People I know would see baby photos of Janet and swear it was me, that's how much we looked alike.
I met a guy in his 70s who I befriended, and whom I absolutely looked at as a father figure since mine died before I was born. The guy gained all my trust, (which I have a hard time giving away at first) and then used me for encouragement and for help and then I never heard from him again. That hurt like a bullet because as I said, I looked at him as a father figure. I adored him, and he used me and then ran off. I never heard from him again.
I didn't go to college but I went to nursing school online and then found a night job as an RN and then the same thing happened, co-workers, yeah, they were nice and friendly but no matter how hard I reached out to be their friend? Nope, got shut down EACH and EVERY time. I'm also a filmmaker and EVERY time I tried to launch a film project? A film project by ME? Nope, the universe, life is not letting that happen, I would get shut down - repeatedly and I had some DAMN GOOD film projects with SOLID investment plans created up. Others around me in the filmmaking world would get their projects launched, funded, just like that but when it came time for me? Nope - over and over and over and over and over again.
Then, there was this actor I was interested in casting in one of my films, but of course, the film project never launched but I really liked him. He looked like a younger version of Ty Pennington. his name is Jonathan Fritz, a really pretty name, I was attracted to him, so even though the project didn't go anywhere, I tried making some talk with him through email, I even tried friending him on Facebook - guess how that ended? He not only "ghosted" me, as the young people say, but he just ignored every attempt I made, and that hurt. Goddamn it did that hurt because I really, really, really, really liked him.
Then on Twitter, I had 106 followers, I joined Twitter to interact and meet new people but nope, that's not happening. Despite me trying my 500% damndest to interact with them, (I sent some of them online birthday cards on their birthday and Thanksgiving cards on Thanksgiving) and make friends with them, they just avoid me like the plague. The one really great actor followed me back after I followed him - Corin Nemec, but I barely get conversation from him, like others who like me, aren't on his fame level can. I mean, I've seen regular people, janitors, teachers, and such have full-on conversations with the dude, but I try and I get a small one or two sentence reply, and then that's it. I make tweets and no one likes them, comments on them, replies to them...Then I took notice of this one guy and his name I'll keep secret, but he's a voice actor and he's just beautiful. 6'2, honey-golden blond hair, ocean blue eyes. Oh, he's just a living version of every prince from every Disney film. He's 50, (I like older men because I feel I can relate to them more because I'm an absolute old soul who feels much, much older than the age that I am) I'm 37 and I fell headfirst into the strongest attraction I ever for him. I followed him on Twitter and started liking almost every post of his, replying to a few of his posts, but only one tweet reply he responded to and it was a nice cordial reply about the law of attraction and gratitude, and then he liked one reply I made in a discussion of his about music, after that and other than that, nope, no matter what I try, I can not get this guy's attention.
And yes, he's single, or at least he seems to be, he asked this other female Twitter user if she were single and for her age, gender and location, so I took that to mean that he's single, because what married person or romantically involved person would ask another female that? Anyway, just like every guy I've ever liked, this guy, my strong attraction for him has gone nowhere but unlike with Jonathan, this one hurts more, it hurts bad because I'm more attracted to this new guy than I was with Jonathan, I think I've gone from attraction to falling heavy for him, but I never told him how I felt because why? Just for him to tell me I'm too young for him, (which is ridiculous considering LOTS of people are doing May-December romances these days) or for him to tell me, "oh sorry, I don't date black women?"
Besides, I wouldn't dare tell him via a public tweet that I'm attracted to him, I'd do that via DM but since he doesn't follow me back, I couldn't. Anyway, the other day, I complimented him on tweet replies he made, and it was a really sweet compliment, telling him that I thought his replies were adorable.....I got crickets.....Crickets are what I have been getting from guys since birth. That hurt. I mean, the female whom he asked was single, why couldn't that have been me? What does she have that I don't? Besides the fact that she's not black...
On Instagram and Facebook, I have the same issues, I reach out to try to make friends or to flirt with a guy I like and....I get avoided like the plague. I mean like if COVID-19 was a person, I'd be it. It's like I'm COVID and people are avoiding me so they won't have to get it. It.....I'm not suicidal or anything but it does make me say, what's the point in living if I'm unlovable, unlikable, and unwanted by everyone except my mother (my mother is the sweetest woman to me).
So, that's my story. something is wrong with me. I think I'm cursed and have been since birth because everything I try to do fails, everyone I reach out to, backs away from me or uses me and abandons me. I just feel like I'm a waste of air. I'm here for absolutely....nothing except to be an example of a lifetime of bad luck.
tl;dr: Everyone avoids me like the plague.
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2021.11.29 11:14 Zestyclose-Custard-8 ZESTYCLOSE FOR MOD with no permissions pt2
2021.11.29 11:14 MaxxFisher Sharon Stone, 1988
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2021.11.29 11:14 kngrmx2022 Who is Three Gunas? What are the three Gunas? More info visit Satlok Ashram Youtube Channel. Sant Rampal Ji Maharaj
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2021.11.29 11:14 caseyst David Gulpilil Dead: ‘Crocodile Dundee’ & ‘Walkabout’ Actor Was 68
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2021.11.29 11:14 thaleskpl [SEARCHING] #22GLYGP8Y 
2021.11.29 11:14 Smilefriend Ha 45 anni ed è della provincia di Ancona l'uomo della pacca sul sedere alla giornalista Greta Beccaglia dopo Empoli-Fiorentina: pesanti le accuse a suo carico
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2021.11.29 11:14 ThinInvestment1214 She really looks younger
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2021.11.29 11:14 Nabila35 #ico
2021.11.29 11:14 clean_dreams Best way to age gracefully is look 50 for 50 years
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2021.11.29 11:14 DidIHearOil Its impossible for a cent to beat a conq
2021.11.29 11:14 HarsH_ShakZ What's the best month of the year?
2021.11.29 11:14 leftok Bitcoin is trading at attractive prices in India; here’s why
2021.11.29 11:14 leftok Crypto sharing name with Omicron variant outperformed Bitcoin soaring 900%. Can we trust it?
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2021.11.29 11:14 QuiFong So what is the max time you should hide in the bathroom?
2021.11.29 11:14 mythreesons238 Birthday wishes
Hoping you guys will enjoy and understand. Today’s my birthday and I haven’t had a candle/cake in a few years yet, my family/husband/kids got me one last night. Only felt right to make a wish that sweet justice be served to Pest. Usually it’s world peace but apparently I have to be specific with wishes. Tomorrow starts new beginnings!
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2021.11.29 11:14 tigerjck Adopted these stray kittens who were left near my doorstep. Meet Cleo and Lucy .
2021.11.29 11:14 oktapus86 6 yılda ne kadar fakirleştik?
Ben bunu hayatımdan basit bir örnekle anlatacağım. 2015 yılında asgari ücretle bir avmde çalışıyordum. Çocukluğumdan beri oyun meraklısı olduğum için paraya kıyıp 1500 liraya ps4 aldım. Maaşım 1350 lira idi. Yani neredeyse bir maaşa en güncel en gelişmiş oyun konsolunu aldım. Şimdi ps5 fiyatlarına baktım 16 bin tl. Yani 5 asgari ücretten fazla. Saplantılı ideoloji ve inanç sisteminin ülkemizi getirdiği nokta bu. Hükümetlerin görevi halkını müreffeh, huzur ve güven içinde yaşatmaktır. Umarım Türk halkı 2023 seçimlerine kadar bunu anlar.
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2021.11.29 11:14 minimalist_john Anybody knows how to use pedagogic grammar in a sentence? And/or just how pedagogic grammar really work?
2021.11.29 11:14 Juicychickenbreast IWFTR
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2021.11.29 11:14 TPastore10ViniciusG What is the difference, in practice, between an e-bike and a moped?
I like e-bikes, and I would want one myself, but are they really as revolutionary as some make it seem?
E-bikes go just as fast as mopeds, without a motor. You could say they create less noise and pollution, but now you have electric mopeds, which eliminate that problem too.
I guess you don't need a license, and it's cheaper. What else?
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2021.11.29 11:14 Postingforfun69 Victoria Justice – Disney’s ‘Pirates of the Caribbean: What Comes Around Goes Around’ event in Beverly Hills
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2021.11.29 11:14 Nex_Tyme We thought this was a plastic plant for almost a year. Can someone help me identify it so that I can take care of it?
2021.11.29 11:14 Arnoldo1466 Wallet Connect: risks?
from what I understand, you can use Wallet Connect with Ledger in order to access Defi platforms. I'm a bit worried however to use it. Let's say I want to stake 1 Avax, once I give approval, is it possible for a malicious contract or else to steal the rest of my Avax or other Coins on differents blockchains in my Ledger? Would it be safer to keep a different wallet to interact with Defi? Thanks a lot.
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2021.11.29 11:14 MJ_THE_PRO How many of you are from Australia